Dreams

"i've got a dream with your face in it
that scares me awake"

[Ani DiFranco - Shy on the album Not A Pretty Girl]

I had to undergo nightmares last night. After the second one - which was kind of being playing Jumanji on a dirty lake and being chased by a crocodile [don't ask, I don't where that came from] - from which I woke up when I fell off the boat, I couldn't get any sleep at all anymore. So I slept about 2 or 3 hours and that was it.

Why do we get to dream at all? It's said we dream a lot of different things the whole night through (or at least at certain times of the sleep cycle) but only remember a few. What decides whether we'll remember a dream and not another? What makes that we sometimes have pleasant dreams and at some other times they're just nasty and bad? I must have stressed about going back to work last night and it brought some weird nightmare with everything going wrong with me and having the boss that always wears a sly smile on his face bash me like never before. But the second nightmare is still a huge mystery to me.

The night before was totally different. With cool dreams of having fun with some people and one about a cuddle (from which I woke up sad seeing I was just hugging my pillow). Is there necessarily a reason why we go from a nice night to a very bad one? From positive unconscious thoughts to very dark ones? Or is it just so very random no one can ever explain it really? It's fascinating to me.

Somehow I wish I had the answers to my questions but at the same time it wouldn't be much fun anymore to know how it works. The déjà-vu feeling has always impressed me, too. Especially at some point of my adolescence when I had so many of those times previsualized in dreams that I could tell what would happen a few seconds before. It stopped. Or maybe it was simply all in my head.

The most ironical thing about this : random play in the car this morning brought : Silent Revolution - Dreaming.

"Don't stop dreaming your life
'Cause life's there for dreaming
And dreaming is for free.
[...] Don't stop dreaming and never wake up"

It never fitted better than today.

[photo: my tiny Dreamcatcher, which obviously doesn't work quite as well as it should]